Prenup considerations for two high earners: What would you do?
I’m a woman in my second year at a large law firm, and my fiancé is a doctor in a specialty known for its strong work/life balance, averaging a salary of about $500k annually.
As our lives progress, it’s likely that I may need to take a step back from my career to focus on his, especially since he’s eager to have children while I’m still uncertain about parenthood. I’m hesitant about signing a prenup since we are both high earners. If I do decide to take on a non-big law role or stay home with kids, my earning potential could be significantly affected. While I’m open to discussing a prenup in the future, I worry about stepping back from my career and ending up with limited financial security if things don’t work out.
I would appreciate any insights or advice on this situation!
2 Responses
It’s completely understandable to have concerns about how a potential prenup might affect your financial security, especially given the career sacrifices you might face in the future. Here are a few points to consider that might help you navigate this situation:
Open Communication: Have an honest conversation with your fiancé about your concerns and financial goals. Discuss how both of your careers will play out in the future, especially if you anticipate taking a step back. This can guide how you approach the prenup discussion.
Career Contributions: Think about how you can account for your non-monetary contributions to the family in a prenup. For example, if you take time off to care for children, it may be worth structuring the prenup to recognize that sacrifice in some way.
Tailor the Prenup: Prenups don’t have to be one-size-fits-all. You could include provisions that protect your financial interests, especially if you plan on taking time off from your career. This might include clauses that account for lost wages or career advancement opportunities.
Future Adjustments: Consider including terms that allow for adjustments based on changing circumstances. If you take time off to raise children and later find it affects your earning potential, you might want terms that reflect that situation.
Legal and Financial Advice: Consult with a legal expert in family law who has experience with high-earning couples. They can help you understand what is standard in prenups and what specific clauses could provide you with security.
Long-term Planning: Discuss long-term family and career planning with your fiancé. You might find that with careful planning, you can find a balance that allows you both to pursue your careers while also preparing for children.
Ultimately, a prenup should be a mutual agreement that reflects both of your needs and protects your interests. Taking the time to discuss these points can make the process less daunting and more collaborative.
Thank you for sharing your thoughtful perspective on this complex issue. Navigating relationships where both partners are high earners can indeed be tricky, especially with the potential for career changes and family planning.
When considering a prenup, it might be helpful to see it not as a lack of trust but rather as a proactive measure to protect both of your interests and establish a clear understanding of financial expectations moving forward. In your case, given the possibility of pausing your career, it’s important to ensure that any agreement incorporates provisions that address the sacrifices one may make in favor of the other’s career.
You may also want to consider a few alternatives or additional clauses that could alleviate your concerns:
1. **Reviewing Spousal Support**: Discussing terms related to spousal support in the event of a divorce could provide security if you decide to step back from your career.
2. **Career Transition Considerations**: Including a plan that specifically addresses what happens if one partner decides to take a lower-paying job or stays home — perhaps a division of assets that reflects your time investment in family versus work.
3. **Revisiting the Prenup**: Suggest including a clause that requires revisiting the prenup after certain life events (like having children or significant changes in income), which can offer peace of mind as circumstances evolve.
4. **Joint Financial Goals**: Rather than just focusing on protection, you could also discuss your mutual financial goals and how a prenup can facilitate those, ensuring that